Nick wrote two quick takes on his experiences with TBI recovery and where he stands, currently. Here they are presented in one post. We would like to thank Nick for continuing to post from a unique perspective and appreciate the work he has done for us.
Adjusting is not quitting.
I finished my Pilates teacher training in Toronto last Sunday – thank you Body Harmonics! I’m feeling great and have confidence that I will be a good and effective teacher. It’s due to the outstanding instruction I’ve gotten from Sarah Stoker at Pony Locale here in St. John’s and the amazing teacher training from Larisa Makuch and Margot McKinnon at Body Harmonics. The excellence of the instruction I’ve received notwithstanding, I’m happy and confident because Pilates suits me. It fits well with my personality and where I am currently; in life, location, and in the time since my brain injury. Pilates wasn’t even in my mind 5 years ago and if you had asked me about taking on Pilates before my brain injury, I wouldn’t have been interested. I am now though. Very interested. And happy and confident too.
I didn’t write this post to talk about Pilates, but about change, about adjustment after, in my case, a very serious brain injury. It’s about having an open mind and knowing that just because adjustment is tough, especially at a challenging point in your life, it doesn’t mean trying something new is a waste of time. Just the opposite actually. While having an unwanted challenge thrown at you can be tough, a challenge you give yourself can be exhilarating! It doesn’t even have to mean a drastic change in your mindset, just a different activity. Before my brain injury, playing water polo and cycling were activities from which I got a lot of enjoyment. I would still love to play a game of water polo like I used to. I would still love to hop on a bike and just ride all day. That doesn’t happen anymore, but, after finally listening to my sister, with encouragement from physios, I decided to try something that keeps me motivated, interested, and looking to improve. Maybe it was something you used to do, but ‘life got in the way’ and you stopped. Maybe it’s something you do every day and would like to know more about. Or maybe it’s something that has never even crossed your mind.
There are aggravating and depressing times while recovering, but those times don’t need to last forever. Instead of refusing yourself of any happiness until you recover all of the abilities you think you have lost, embrace the opportunity to try something different. Whatever that is.
I’ve received some very nice and intriguing comments about my last post and they led me to write more about the idea of adjusting.
In essence, it’s life. Life is one long adjustment, with a bunch of intermittent adjustments thrown in. I wrote my last post, initially with the idea of talking to brain injury survivors. The more I wrote and gave my views, the more I realized that it applied to everyone who has had to deal with an unintentional life-changing event. Then, after my post (post-post), some comments got me thinking of who else may be able to relate and then thought “everyone”.
Graduation (from high school, college, or university) is an adjustment. A new job is an adjustment. Having kids is an adjustment. Retiring is an adjustment. These are simply easy ones to name, “big” ones. They all get more challenging the less prepared you are for it. For example, graduation is an event you see coming and it’s achieved with intention. It’s viewed as a good thing. An accomplishment. All of those events, when approached with intention and preparation are what we view as accomplishments. Intention and preparation.
Those two important elements are generally lacking when an accident happens and we’re forced to make an adjustment. Although making adjustments are what life’s all about, and although life is viewed as a good thing, ‘adjustment’ has a negative connotation. People are “forced to make adjustments” and even when given a positive spin, it’s with a qualifier – “a good adjustment”, “the correct adjustment”.
Since adjustments are such an essential and ever-present part of life, viewing them negatively goes against the whole notion of life being good. Embracing the idea of adjustment, that adjustment makes life more interesting (whether due to a “good” or “bad” event), gives a new look to challenges.
It’s not about ‘making the best of a bad situation’, it’s simply about adjusting.